"Social Roles"

When people gather, a society is formed.
Perhaps animals are the same.
If so, then living beings gather and form societies.

Friends, lovers, family, school, companies, bands, nations—
all of them are societies created by people coming together.

And whenever a society exists, each participant seems to have a role.
It feels like a powerful force—
something carved into us, something we can’t resist.

Some people call it fate, or destiny.

Those who understand their own role, I think, are fortunate.

As a live musician, or as a performer, one’s social role
is to release oneself through sound
and share it with the people in front of them.

But I feel I don’t have the temperament to fit into that.

Likewise, an “artist” is something multifaceted.
To create, to perform, to be loved.

Each of these is a skill, a profession.
Since I don’t possess all three, I am not yet an artist.

In other words, I am nothing.

And yet, I can create.

If there are people who listen,
and if they seek what I make,
then I may come to know my role.

If my ability to create is valued, I become a composer.
If the things I create are valued, I become an artist.

If, as an artist, people begin to want live performances,
then I can become a performer as well.

Or, if only my playing ability is valued,
maybe I will live as a player.

This is the sequence of things.

For now, I only have the skill of creating.
So I will devote myself to making things for a while.
If I am sought after someday, I will be able to perform live.
I don’t have to start with live shows like other musicians.

Thinking about it this way
has made me feel a little lighter.